Things in the Way of My Progress

...but the creativity is still flowing strong

Those on my Discord kind of know what’s going on with me, as of late. However, those not on that server because it’s primarily for other writers/creatives (a sort of network to share ideas and help one another) do not know what’s going on. So, I figured I’d cover some of that and expand on it even more than I have on Discord.

Basically, my living situation is not ideal and with that, it’s next to impossible for me to work on anything creative while I’m at home. Ideally, this should be my space to work. I should have peace of mind and the ability to focus, buckle down, and get shit done. Until I solve this problem, which currently appears to be unsolvable, this is going to have a negative effect on my creative output… and sanity.

Additionally, I am dealing with a lot of nerve pain in various places that I have overcome previously. However, nerves are tricky bastards and the pain has moved to different parts of my body. Currently, and for a few weeks now, it has felt like there is a literal knife in my left shoulder blade. Sometimes, I feel it in my right shoulder blade too. This makes it hard to be comfortable enough to stay asleep. Also, my left elbow gets extremely sore at night. Once I’m up and about and 4+ ibuprofens deep, it starts to subside. The nerve stuff is something I’ve been dealing with since early 2017. It comes and goes and not a single doctor has been helpful.

Beyond that, work is a bit crazy but nothing as bad as it was 6 months ago. However, that could change as I work in a place with a complete lack of structure and leadership, which only seems to be getting worse as time goes on.

All these negative clouds aside, I am still on a creative stride and I am continuing to make progress on the next book when I can. Usually, this comes at early hours before work and at my office where I can actually have peace of mind, blasting my “fantasy writing” playlist.

To be honest, writing is just about my only escape from the shit of life, lately.

Although, I’ve also found a good group of men that I spend time with on the weekend - smoking cigars and talking about all sorts of interesting things. A nice group of mature minds and something that I’ve needed for quite awhile. It’s doubly good, as since moving to this area I now live in, I haven’t had a social life. Friends are just too far away and I may see one or a few of them once per month if I’m lucky.

I think it is the need for an escape that has sort of pushed the creativity out of me, though. I just wish I could be more productive and not be bogged down by the shit I can’t control.

Anyway, that’s just where things are at on a personal level. I’m just trying to work through it, but every light at the tunnel seems to go dark before I can reach it.